Marriage expectations are changing among Generation Z and Millenials. In a survey done by the Thriving Center of Psychology, two out of five people said marriage is an outdated tradition and is not necessary for a fulfilling and committed relationship.
The Dream of Getting Married
The dream to get married, buy a house, and have children is less prevalent in today’s society. Many unmarried couples living together feel as though their lives would not benefit from marriage.
The Concept of Marriage Has Evolved
There is no doubt that the concept of marriage has evolved over the decades.
What was once a business or political arrangement between families has become a very expensive ceremony that ends in divorce half the time.
Reasons for Not Wanting to Get Married
Members of the BuzzFeed Community were asked their reasons for not wanting to get married and their answers all varied.
Marriage Is a Prison
One member said she’s never dreamed of getting married because her parents’ marriage wasn’t good. She sees marriage as a “prison” and said she valued her freedom and independence too much to get married.
Debt Is Keeping People From Getting Married
Another member stated debt was his reasoning for not getting married. Because of the amount of student loan debt he has, he doesn’t want to risk his partner not being able to buy a home or take out a loan of their own.
Combining Your Finances
Combining your finances with someone else can be daunting because you never know how someone else handles their money. Plus, if you marry someone with a lot of debt, that debt becomes your debt as well.
After divorcing her abusive ex-husband, another online commenter was on the hook for the credit cards he stopped paying on. While he was in jail for the abuse, she was stuck paying his bills while simultaneously trying to heal from a broken and abusive marriage. Talk about exhaustion.
Including the Government in Relationships
Bringing the government and creditors into a relationship is not enticing for some people. Another member’s opinion on marriage is that “you can commit to someone without paying the government to be allowed to do so.
And that way, you don’t have to pay the government AGAIN to get out of it.”
Divorce Is Expensive
Getting a divorce is complicated, expensive, and messy. In today’s society, a lot of people would rather not get married just in case it doesn’t work out and the marriage ends in divorce.
Whoever entered the marriage with more money, now has to split it in half with the partner they are divorcing.
No Religious Reason to Get Married
Another BuzzFeed Community member said, “I have never cared about [marriage]. As an atheist, I have no religious reason to get married.
The whole tax incentive thing never seemed like a good enough reason to commit yourself to another person.” He doesn’t see any benefit in changing his relationship status to married.
Marriage No Longer Benefits Women
There is also the opinion that “traditional heterosexual marriage doesn’t benefit women.” Most families can’t get by on one paycheck in today’s society, so the husband and the wife are both working outside the home.
Even though both are working a full time job, the cooking, the cleaning, and caring for the children can still be seen as the woman’s job.
No One Wants More Mess to Clean Up
Husbands sometimes view doing household duties as “helping” their wives rather than doing their equal share for the family.
Miss_tee said she is “much happier raising kids as a single mom without feeling resentful of a husband who actually created more work” for her. Running a household takes a lot of work and people want a partner who will contribute their fair share.
Selfish Reasons Keep Some From Marriage
Some people don’t want to get married for selfish reasons. Kishbish talks about loving her life, her routine, and her “little house that wouldn’t be big enough for two people to live in.”
Hindering Personal Freedoms
Thia_m likes only having to be responsible for herself. She can “make last-minute decisions or spend the day in bed watching Netflix” if she chooses. Having a partner can hinder those personal freedoms.
Do What Makes You Happy
Marriage is a personal preference, but statistics have shown a decline in marriage among younger generations.
Whatever Floats Your Boat
Satisfaction comes in many forms, and not everyone finds satisfaction in getting married. Many people have found their life to be more fulfilling while single or just living with their partner.
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